I've always considered one of my strong suits is my ability to work well with children. What I had not realized is the difficulty of creating a great relationship with the youths, and being the authoritative figure. My past work involved with youths was babysitting and some work at my local teen center. My job in both those situation were to make sure the kids and teens didn't destroy the place. Although I warned the youths to stop partaking in whatever troublesome activity they were doing, it was from a place of suggestion rather than a demand. If they wouldn't listen, I would tell them I would call their parents or bring the teen center manager over. Never situation was I the acting voice of authority.
As the 4-H intern, when I am not leading an activity, I make sure the youths stay focused on the task at hand, and more importantly stay safe. On occasions, a problem arises. When refocusing my young participants, sometimes a simple suggestion won't make the cut. However, making sure the youth leaves the activity with a positive mindset is critical, so resorting to a direct demand isn't always the best choice. Ultimatums and bribery never end fairly for either party, and normally end in jealously from other participants or a disgruntled attitude.
The only solution seems to be a direct order but without any anger or stern rapport. Simply telling them to stop whatever non productive or potentially harmful activity they are participating in works wonders. They know what you need them to do, but don't feel upset or mad because you aren't either. Every time when working with the youth of Arlington, I am impressed with how smart they are at their young age. Many of them understand completely when told that their activity is dangerous and need to end.
